Children’s Ministry Online

I’ll be honest. I’ve always hated “Promotion Sunday.”

I’ve always hated losing my 5th graders. By the time they’re ready to move on the 6th grade, I just love them too much to want to let go. I’ve invested so much into them. I’ve also hated promotion because inevitably, many of them won’t make the transition. Because the program is so different, some of the kids don’t adjust well to the difference. Sometimes it is even the parents who resist sending their kids to a program that is so different with teenagers that are so much older. So, many of these kids who don’t make the transition end up sneaking back into kids church for a few weeks or months. Eventually, many of them feel like they don’t fit and eventually stop coming. For many, it may be a year or two before they end up showing up in Student Ministry. Some never do.

That is why I hate Promotion Sunday.

However, this time I’m really excited. Well, since I don’t really know any of the kids yet at Gateway, I’m not attached to those 5th graders. But that’s not why I’m excited. I’m excited because for the first time I feel like a strong plan is being put into place to capture “most” of our 5th graders. Our student pastor will be offering middle school programs during all of our weekend services. The Middle School service isn’t going to be so totally different that the 5th graders can’t relate. So, for the 5th grader to make the transition, he/she simply has to walk down the hall to another room. That’s it.

Chad, the student pastor and I have been talking about how if we can make this transition successful, his Middle School program could triple. In addition, if we continue to create tight hand-offs every year, his entire student ministry could be 3 or 4 times larger in just a few year just by kids growing up in the programs. What’s not exciting about that? I’ll continue to post about how this transition is going. We’re planning several “preview events” throughout the summer to make those 5th graders beg for promotion day!!!

That’s a title that will get attention!

Two weeks ago at Orange, I attended a breakout with Nancy Ortberg about creating healthy conflict. I sat amazed about this new paradigm (I thought we were all supposed to get along). Apparently we’re supposed to duke it out in staff meeting. I like it!

After the breakout I asked Nancy for more information. I wanted to grow in this area. She gave me the names of three books. So that week I went to the bookstore and came home with five (not sure how that happened exactly). So far I’ve read two. Death by Meeting and the Five Dysfunctions of Team. Incredible books. I’ve heard of Death by Meeting and a previous employer recommended the Five Dysfunctions. Both books have encouraged me in many ways, especially as I’m new to my organization. I’ve been leading meeting for years, yet no one every taught me how to lead a meeting. I’ve lead teams for years and several of my teams have had some forms of dysfunction. Now I feel much better equipped to lead both teams and meetings in a slightly different way.

So, if you lead teams and meetings, you’ll love these books. There’s a common bond between them and I’m sure they’ll help you in your situation. Soon I’ll blog about each of these books in detail.

I’m curious though. Is there anyone out there who has read these books and applied them to your work? How has that turned out?

I’m not exactly sure that “leaky” is a real word. But I think it’s a question we all have to ask ourselves. Actually, there are many questions that have to be established before asking this one.

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A similar thought as been thrown at me from many different directions this last month. This though involves vision. Steven Furtick in one of his audio blog talked about speaking vision so much your throat is hoarse. At Orange, Craig Jutila spoke about how without vision, people run wild (Craig does a great job helping people develop mission and vision to present to their organizations). Then just yesterday, I was confronted with a powerful example of vision working the way it is supposed to. Vision when it leaks down and saturates the organization.

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Sorry it’s been kind of quite on the blog lately. As most of you know, I started my new job as Next Generation Pastor at Gateway Community Church last week. It was a great first week. Really, of the first weeks I’ve had with new jobs, it definitely ranks at the very top.

On my first day in the office, I came with a suitcase. Yeah, the first time I’ve done that. We left that day for a Texas Large Church forum in Dallas, TX. The forum was pretty good, but I had a lot of time to get to know fellow staff members who I’ll be working with. I roomed with the new Student Pastor (he’s a trip) and got some good hangout time with everyone. Even got out one night to see Iron Man with Chad (the student pastor) and both of the people I report to. Fun!

Thursday was my only day in the office last week, and it was a busy one! I’ll write more this week about some great things I’m learning from my new church, from my new job, and from some great books I’m reading right now.

Since I left Orange a few days ago, I’ve been traveling from Atlanta to Austin. Now my wife, my 11 month old boy and 70 pound chocolate lab are settled in an Extended Stay in Austin as I’m now up in Dallas, TX. Yesterday was my first official day as the Next Generation Pastor at Gateway Community Church in Austin, TX. I spent the Sunday morning at both the South and North Campuses just checking things out and getting a feel of what is going on. After church, we drove around for several hours looking at neighborhoods (we really don’t want to make our Extended Stay visit extended). Lastly, we wrapped up the day with a leadership community meeting at the church with the Children’s Ministry volunteers.

This morning I took off for a two day gathering in Dallas, Texas. Eleven or so churches are gathering for the Texas Larch Church Forum where other large, like-minded churches will discuss issues, successes and strategies in a variety of ministries and departments. So, it should be a great time to get to know members from my team as well as connect with others in my area of ministry.

I should have some time to catch up on a couple of posts I’ve been meaning to write. I posted like crazy during Orange and I’d like to write some closing thoughts about Orange. Good stuff!

Unfortunately, I had to take a phone call with my new church right when Louie Gigleo got up to speak. My phone call lasted almost the entire message. I came in just as Louie was talking about some trees in a courtyard in China and who the last verse of Amazing Grace wasn’t written by the original author, but some other guy over 100 years later. Yup, I didn’t make the connection. I’ll search the blogs for someone else’s notes on this message and add them here (or link to them here). If you were there, have notes and want to send them my way, I’ll link to them (or publish them here).

Yeah. I’ve actually never heard Louie and was looking forward to it… but that’s okay. I’m not going to complain. I got plenty of good stuff from Orange.

This session was led by Craig Jutila. Someone said that most of this information is in his book "Daze to Knights." I knew he had this book, but I didn’t think this was about volunteers. I’ve heard Craig on several occasions and I’ve heard most of this stuff before. However, it is good stuff and I really needed to hear it again. Volunteerism is one of the biggest issues in ministry, so everyone could hear this stuff multiple times.

First things:

• You don’t organize people, you align them
• You build people first and programs second
• You understand that without people, you do not nor can you have a healthy ministry
• Without a mission statement, you will never thrive with your volunteers
• We are all made differently

One of the problems we have is that we often try to make everyone do the same about of work. People are different. Our goal should be to help them reach their potential.

Craig talked about the 80/20 rule. 20% of your volunteers are doing 80% of the work. It’s a principle… expect this. Those 20% are your high impact volunteers. Of 100% of your volunteers, here is how they might break down:

• 5% - Influential: Empower
• 15% - Initiator: Energize
• 30% - Independent: Equip
• 50% - Industrious: Encourage

Craig then talked about how Jesus led "volunteers."

• 1 Corinthians 15:6 - Jesus appeared to more than 500 followers. He encouraged them by motivating them.
• Luke 10:1-2 - Jesus appointed 72 and sent them out in groups of two. He appointed them to do a task.
• Matthew 26:20 - Jesus sat with his 12. He spent time with them, they were his friends.
• Matthew 17:1 - Jesus took his three aside. This was his intimate group.

We seen in scripture that Jesus spent most of his time with small numbers of people.. investing in them. Jesus spent the least amount of time with large groups. We need to see our volunteers this same way. We need to have a small number that we’re investing in "big time" where we are empowering them to lead others.

A few last points:

• Resist the temptation to personally "fill holes." It’s not that you’re better than that… it’s not where you belong.
• The volunteers who challenge you because they have their own ideas usually frustrate us…. but they are your best volunteers. They have the potential to lead your ministry. You need to invest in them and leak your vision.
• You’re always going to need volunteers… if your ministry is growing. Synchronizing volunteers isn’t about eliminating your need for more volunteers. However, if you do these things right, you’ll put an end to managing the substitute list every week. Your volunteers will own their ministry.
• Craig says this works… so give it a try.

Like the Rethinking Children’s Ministry, this breakout was more of a round table discussion. On the stage was Mike Clear from Discovery Church in California, Daren Kaiser from Scranton, PA, Dave Fox from Indiana and Reggie Joiner. Each of these men serve as the Family Pastor at their churches (except Reggie of course).

Reggie began by explaining some of the different models of family ministry. One model is the departmental approach. This is where each department (student and children’s ministry) does it’s best to connect with parents. Another model is the supplemental approach. This is where a family pastor is hired to add programs to supplement parents ministry. This pastor more or less informs the other staff members (children’s pastor and student pastor) what he/she is doing. The Orange model is an integrated model. There may or may not be a family pastor (best if there is) that helps family ministry integrate through all the ministries.

Through a family ministry approach (integrated), the goal for teenagers is not perfect attendance in student ministry, but that they become fully integrated into the fabric of the church.

Reggie perfectly answered the question, "How do you effectively make a children’s ministry team and student ministry team feel like a unified team?" The answer? Meet together. Duh!

In an integrated strategy, you remove ministry silos and territorialism. In this strategy, student and chidlren teams work together on budgets, calendars and other things.

Reggie shared that there are three dials that need to be turned in the life of a child. The Wonder Dial, the Discovery Dial and the Passion Dial. The Wonder Dial is the understanding of faith, creation and who God is. The Discovery Dial is the understanding of how I personally fit into this knowledge of God, specifically relating to having a relationship with Jesus Christ. The Passion Dial is understanding my relationship with those around me.

So, when an integrated family ministry operates with the knowledge of these dials, the team can work together to turn these dials at the appropriate times within ministry. For instance, the Wonder Dial will be turned most during the preschool years, and only a little beyond that (mainly for outreach opportunities). The Discovery Dial is turned the most in elementary ministry and and student ministry and the Passion Dial will be turned the most in student ministry. Implementing this in an integrated strategy allows everyone in multiple ministries to be on the same page.

Here are a few more points made by the presenters:

• When you believe that what happens at home is more important than what happens at church, your calendar will slim down (from events).
• Who owns the strategy to "educate" the parents? It’s owned by the whole team, led by a leader.
• Every parent wants to have the right relationship with their kids… every kid needs a right relationship with a parent.

Oh, there was one more thing. Reggie shared four words and said that most parents fall into one of these four categories:

• Acquainted
• Connected
• Engaged
• Invested

Acquainted are usually the parents outside of your church… they don’t come. They aren’t against God or anything… they just don’t come. The Connected parents are attending your church. Engaged parents are ones that assume responsibility for spiritually raising their kids and Invested are those who are actively involved in discipling their kids… they’re doing this regularly.

I’m wiped. Really, totally wiped.

It’s 12:45 AM and I’m pooped. I still need to blog two breakouts and another session… but I don’t have it in me. Tomorrow I’m attending the Orange facebook party. Should be fun. Hoping to network and meet some people I couldn’t in the crowd of 4500.

Tomorrow I’m heading out to Jackson, MS (my journey to Austin, TX). So, while I’m taking a break and my wife is driving, I’ll blog the rest of the Orange conference and hopefully post it by the end of the day. You never know what kind of Internet access you’ll get while on the road.

BTW, did I say that Orange was awesome?