I need to tell you about an even we held at Gateway this weekend. I claim no responsibility for this event, it was the brain child of my wife. I came to support her, but I did little to support her. This event was for me. Let me tell you a little about it.
Born Into Heaven was a memorial service to recognize and honor the short and quite lives of children lost to miscarriage, still birth and abortion. It was held on Saturday, the day before mother’s day as so many parents, especially moms, are burdened with the thoughts of their lost children. Too many parents lose children to miscarriage and they suffer in silence. Many times, no one knows of their loss. Although they never held their child, it doesn’t make that child any less alive or any less their own flesh and blood. Parents rarely have the time or space to mourn this loss. Other parents are shattered with the loss of a child at birth. Because it is so unexpected and tragic, people don’t know how to comfort these families or help them deal with the loss. Other parents suffer in silence over the guilt of hasty decisions of their youth. A quick abortion solves an immediate problem, yet leaves the stain of regret and guilt. Shouldn’t the church help families grieve and heal? That’s what Born Into Heaven is all about.
My wife thought up this event about 6 weeks ago when she was pregnant with our 6th child. Sara and I both know the pain of loss. During this difficult and tentative week-to-week pregnancy, Sara was burdened to create a place for families to mourn. It wasn’t just born out of a need other parents had, it was born out of something Sara and I needed. Other than a few close friends and immediate family, few people knew of our silent suffering. Few people know that Titus is our fourth child, the only one to make it past 9 weeks from conception. He’s our little miracle, our ray of light in a barren land of death and disappointment. Last year we lost our 5th child and only 4 weeks ago, we lost our 6th. Again, only a few people knew our pain, but a memorial such as Born Into Heaven is what paretns in our shoes need.
Like I said before, I came to support my wife. She shared our story on the stage, but she couldn’t look at me as I was an emotional wreck. So many people were able to come together, share their stories and recognize their loss. Many who go through this kind of loss neglect to consider themselves as moms and dads, but that is what they are. This day was about parents honoring their kids and processing through their pain.
Tomorrow I’ll share some of the details of the service as it may be something you will want to re-create for families in your church.
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