Tag Archives: Baptism
Faith development of a child: Episode 1
Posted on 23. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
Well, it all started with talking about baptism and then moving on to leading a child to faith. For some reason I don’t feel completely done with the subject. Maybe this is more or me than you, the reader of this blog.
There are a lot of ideas swirling in my head and I’ll try to grab them and formulate coherent thoughts concerning them.
The other day Henry Zonio wrote a post discussing the idea of careless evangelism being equated to child abuse. Henry wasn’t saying this, just responding that idea.
Henry did reference Mark 9:42 about the heap of trouble we’ll be in or leading a child toward sin. I can’t quite get this verse to completely fit in this context. I don’t condone careless evangelism, having kids raise their hand and repeating a prayer to fulfill the greatest decision in life, but I can’t quite believe that this is the same as the action described in Mark 9:42. HOWEVER, as a rational human being and a Christ Follower with a brain, I can’t see careless evangelism as something that God’s crazy about. I imagine that it makes him sick, but that’s just my opinion.
Again, that’s one of the factors that bugs me about rushing baptism. We’re in a rush to make sure a child is a Christ Follower just so they can be baptized. I’ve prayed with several children minutes before getting in the water and it bugs me that they’re making the greatest decision in life because it’s something they’re supposed to do before they get baptized. If that’s the case, we’ve cheapened the thing that’s most precious in life. I came to faith as a four year old. Why? Because I didn’t want to go to Hell! For the next two weeks I prayed in tears that Jesus would come into my heart every day becasue I didn’t want to burn. What four year old wouldn’t? Sure, Hell is a reality for those who reject Christ but when getting out of Hell is our motivation for following of Christ, have we cheapened Christ’s one desire.
I follow Christ becasue it’s what I was created for. I follow Christ becasue it allows me to have community with God. I follow Christ becasue it brings fullness to my life. I follow Christ becasue he’s got a better plan for my life than I have for myself. Shouldn’t this be our motivation.
Perhaps we can begin to curb careless evangelism of children by starting with the proper motivation.
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Kid’s baptisms: Are we focusing on what is most important?
Posted on 17. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
Okay, I thought I had finished this little series, but the conversation in the comments in this post has continued and has prompted me to write one more post.
I’ll be honest. I’m still really wrestling with what we’re going to do here at Gateway. For us to prevent kids to be baptized when it’s happening spontaneously like this seems very anti-Gateway. I don’t feel comfortable with it. However I must admit that every day I think about this, I dislike doing what we’re doing even more. I think I’ve narrowed it down and reached a conclusion on what is most important.
I feel it might be dangerous to allow kids to decide to get baptized because they feel like it the day we’re doing it as a church. That’s right, dangerous. Don’t get me wrong. There are some kids who come up to get baptized and they’ve made a genuine decisions and this was the day they decided to be baptized. However, I don’t think it is the majority.
Here’s the danger. So, a child wants to get baptized. Well, we have people there to meet with that child and talk with them. Often times the person meeting with the child leads them to faith or does the best they can to explain it. What’s dangerous is that we’ve placed our focus on them getting baptized, not their decisions to become a slave to Christ! “Oh, you’ve never asked Jesus to be your Lord and savior? Let’s do that real quick so you can get baptized.” God forbid they miss out on being baptized. Let’s convert ‘em real quick.
Shouldn’t our focus be on their decision to become a Christ Follower? I spend the first five minutes of my class teaching the kids that baptism is something you do as a result of deciding to follow Christ. I also repeat many times that the baptism isn’t nearly as important as this decision. We’ll do more baptisms. Don’t rush this decisions. Baptism can wait. I’m not saying that this is related in any way, but why do we wonder that 70+ percent of our kids abandon their faith when they leave home? Did you hear that? 70+ percent of our kids walk away from their faith when they leave for college. Do you think it’s because we’re elevating baptism above a commitment to Christ? It’s nothing for us to see hundreds of kids come to faith in a year. Woo hoo! That’s awesome! But I think I’d be satisfied to see half that number make this decision if I knew that they really, really, really got it.
Here’s my sticking point. When I walk out of the baptism class, I walk out knowing that they got it. They really got it. Some parents write on their response form “not sure they have made a decision.” That’s great. At least we know where they stand. Let’s not baptize them yet. Let’s make sure they got it.
Really, what’s most important?
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Kid’s baptisms: Post baptism summary
Posted on 15. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
So last week I shared what we’re doing for baptisms at Gateway. This weekend we actually had our baptisms at both our South and North Campus.
I met with a 9 year old girl for about 30 minutes to talk about baptism (she couldn’t make any of the classes). She knew lot’s about faith, but hadn’t ever made a decision to follow Christ. So, it was cool to pray with her and her mom and she was subsequently very excited to get baptized. I baptized her at one service and a set of twins at the next. At the North Campus I baptized four or five kids and assisted two sets of parents in baptizing their kids.
Glorious!
We actually didn’t have any last minute kids show up. Every kid who was baptized had gone through the baptism class, which made me feel much better.
Well, I have 3 more baptism classes set up for this summer with one last baptism in August/September. We won’t make any more changes for this one, but I’m looking to do some more tweaking for next year.
So, here’s what’s on the agenda for the future:
A post baptism class:
We had a baptism in April where about 15-20 kids were baptized without attend the class. I’m thinking of offering a post baptism class just to see who we can get to come out. It won’t be our normal baptism class since these kids have already been baptized. However, there’s a great opportunity to give them tools to develop spiritual disciplines. I’ll have ot think about this one.
Pre-baptism class assignment/Baptism class tweak:
Okay, I love the baptism class and there is little that I want to change. As I wrote in my last post, I specifically cover the ABCs of becoming a Christ follower. the kids really connect with the presentation and as a result, many kids make decisions to follow Christ. However, for the last year or two I’ve been burdened. I feel like I’m leaving an important component out. With the ABC’s I cover the fact that we sin and that Jesus died for our sins, but I don’t feel like the kids really get why we need saving from our sins. It’s easy to talk about how Jesus died on the cross for our sins, but sometimes we don’t really elaborate the real problem our sin causes and why we so desperately need Jesus to save us. However, the baptism class is already a 60 minute class and I’m not sure I want to add another 15 minutes covering this and I dont’ plan to add another class. However, I could create a pre-baptism class assignment. Maybe a downloadable lesson kids can do with their parents or even some video driven content as well. By next summer I want to have this piece in place.
Post baptism process:
I really want to develop a “what’s next” process. Baptism isn’t the end. However, too many parents and kids kinda check-off their spiritual check list with baptism. I want to have a followup to the baptism class where kids and parents learn about spending time with God, growing in their relationship with God and maybe even preparing for communion. I know that attendance for something like this will probably be less than for my baptism class, but I’ll have to figure out how to communicate the vision for what we’re doing and apply the proper motivation.
Well, that’s it. Let me know if you have any ideas, thought or comments! Don’t just lurk!
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Kid’s baptisms: Parent assisted baptism class
Posted on 12. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
Lately I’ve been blogging about how we do baptisms for kids here at Gateway. My last post yesterday pointed to how I’ve changed things to where parents have a more active role in the class. Click here to read that post if you haven’t already.
So, here’s what it looks like. I set up the room with round tables with 6-8 chairs per table. Families or multiple families sit around the table. Once everyone has arrived and we’re about to begin, I pass out the Baptism Class – Parent Guide. I explain to my parents that everything I talk about is in this parent guide, including all the scripture fully typed out. I express my hope that parents will pull this out again to review with the kids later.
Essentially I talk about order. Kids are at the baptism class because they want to be baptized, but I explain that baptism isn’t first, it’s something we do after we’ve become a Christ Follower. I also take a minute to explain terminology. Depending on where they’ve been before Gateway or what they’ve heard other people say, becoming a Christ Follower can be confusing. Is being a Christ Follower the same thing as “getting saved” or asking Jesus into their heart? After we’ve explained terminology and getting to the heart of what this really is, I spend the next 15-20 minutes talking about the ABC’s of becoming a Christ Follower. I’ve been using this from the days of doing Lifeway VBS and of all the tools, it’s my favorite. I feel it’s easy to understand and hits the most important parts of becoming a Christ Follower.
After we’ve covered the ABC, I hand it over to parents. You’ll see there is a section for parents to lead. Basically there are some scripted questions that parents can ask to create discussion and inspire individual conversations. I encourage the parents to really probe their kids, find out if this is information is new. Have they done this before? Has this been new information? Does your child comprehend? Are they ready to make this decision? If so, pray with them now. I’ve even placed a scripted prayer based on the ABC’s that the parent can lead their child in right there. So far, I’ve had parents lead their children to faith every time I’ve done this class. That gets me very excited!
After paretns have 10-15 minutes with their kids, I come back and wrap up the class. I talk about baptism. What it is (a symbol) and what it isn’t (Salvation, washing away our sins). This last bit only takes another 10 minutes. Again, the focus is on making sure kids understand becoming a Christ Follower. We close up with questions.
Once we’re done I had out the Baptism Class – Response Form. This gives me a little feedback, but more importantly it tells me if and when the child has made a decision. The first time I did this class, I had these forms sitting on the table and I found that parents filled this out before the class was over which didn’t tell me if any kids made a decision on that day. So, now I hand this out at the end. This is very helpful!
Last of all, here are my Baptism Class – Teaching Notes. It’s actually most of the class completely scripted out. I’ve been doing this for so many years, I don’t need these. I’ll usually give this to someone else who’s going to teach in my place. I don’t expect them to do this exactly, but it’s a thorough example of my class. They can take it and personalize it. However, I do want them to do the ABC’s and the parent breakout. Everything else is up to them.
Well, that’s my class. I’ll wrap up my thoughts on Monday (I’ve got a few more things to say) What I’m doing now isn’t the end product, I know that . I’ll also start another series on why I swear by the ABC’s next week, leading a child (or adult for that matter) to Christ.
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Kid’s baptisms: The exception to my personal rule
Posted on 10. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
Okay, here I posted about my personal rule. Kids have to meet with me or a pastor before they get baptized. I just want to make sure that kids know what they’re doing or why they’re doing it. However, since coming to Gateway I’ve had to become a little more flexible. I think there is room for compromise here, I just haven’t spent enough time thinking about it. So for now, it is what it is. However, I do anticipate changes by next summer. Perhaps you have some good ideas for me to consider.
In this post I shared how Gateway does baptisms. On average we’ll have 100-125 people baptized at one of our baptism services. Of that number, about half sign up in advance or go through a class. The other half are last minute decisions or people inspired to do so during the service. I really like this. There are a lot of people who God calls their number on this day and the resulting baptism is powerful.
The only thing I don’t like about this is the number of kids who show up to be baptized without having gone through a class. We do have people available to pray with kids and I and some others who work with the kids are available to talk to kids, but it isn’t nearly as good of an experience as the baptism class. What usually ends up happening is a parent really feels inspired to be baptized and often times they decided to make it a family thing… kids and all. Other times a child may just see all the excitement going on and decide that they want to do it on that day. Therefore, we have more kids than I’m happy with getting baptized without the class.
Solutions.
One solution is to offer a post-baptism class. It would basically be the baptism class for those who were just baptized. I think it would be a good experience and it would add value to what they just did. However, I still think it would be strange for some of the kid who would come to faith at the post-baptism class. I’m also a reasonable man. I think we’d be lucky to get 20% of the families to come back to the class. I know that most of the people who come to the baptism class do becasue they think it is required.
The other solution is to just make the baptism class a requirement. I’m not sure how well that would go over, but it may end up being necessary. The baptism service is pretty amazing and so many people are making difficult decisions. There may be some caution toward saying “no” to a family where the parent or parents are struggling with the decision to do it anyway. So, we may just have to find that fine line between being intentional with how we do this for kids and being the open environment that we’ve created for people to easily make this decision if God is moving them in this direction.
What do you think?
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Kid’s baptisms: My personal rule
Posted on 10. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
Children can’t be baptized until they meet with me or one of my leaders.
That’s been my rule for the last 5-6 years. Occasionally I’d stick my head in the auditorium and I’d see another pastor baptizing a child and I’d put my foot down. Turns out at my previous church, the receptionist would actually schedule baptisms each weekend. So, if someone called in to be baptized, she’d schedule them with a pastor. Once I learned this, the receptionist knew to ask if there were children and to run them through the Children’s Ministry before scheduling the baptism.
Why is this so important to me? Because if I didn’t have this rule, about 15-20% of the kids being baptized haven’t yet made decisions to follow Christ. A substantial higher number are getting baptized for the wrong reason.
How do I know this? For the past 5-6 years, I’ve met with the majority of the kids getting baptized. If I had to estimate, I’d put the number at 400-500 kids. As I’d meet with these children, 15-20% would make decisions to follow Christ while meeting with me. That alone is reason enough to require the meeting. I also ask every child why they want to be baptized. Easily 50% of children asked answer with one of the two answers:
- Because I want to go to heaven.
- Because I want Jesus to wash my sins away.
I don’t blame them. They’re kids. They can’t know if they haven’t been taught and for many of these kids, their parents don’t know enough to teach them this. For me, it’s very important that a child be a Christ Follower before getting baptized. Duh! It’s also important for me that a child know that baptism isn’t their ticket into heaven or their holy sin bath either. Not knowing cheapens the experience. Everyone should know why they’re doing what they’re doing. That’s why I stand by my rule and you should too.
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Kid’s baptisms
Posted on 10. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
This Sunday we’re having baptisms at Gateway. We typically do baptisms three or four times a year. We have one of those big inflatable pools that we set up in a grassy area in front of the church and hold baptisms after the services. This Sunday we’re doing them all after our Sunday evening Deepen service.
For the last four or five years I’ve offered baptism classes. Before that, I usually met with the children and parents individually before they wanted to be baptized (this was also at churches that did baptisms every Sunday). On occasions (usually twice a year) I’d have a Kids Baptism Sunday were we would baptize 15, 20 or 30 kids in on one day. Leading up to these weekends I would hold a baptism class so that I could go through this just one or two times instead of 15, 20 or 30 times.
Now that we only do baptisms three or four times a year, I try to offer two or three baptism classes a few weeks leading up to the baptism. I want to give kids ample opportunity to be baptized. At my previous two churches my rule was that a child was not allowed to be baptized until they met with me or someone on staff. That’s a little different now at Gateway (I’ll explain later).
So, I thought I’d share a litte on how we do baptisms, specifically the pre-baptism process. So, my next 3-5 posts will be about baptism with resources, how we’ve changed them and where we feel we still need to go.
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Palm Sunday Baptims
Posted on 14. Apr, 2009 by Kenny.
This post is over a week late. However, I just got my hands on a video that I thought was worth showing to the CMO audience.
On Palm Sunday we had our first baptisms of the year. We do our baptisms outside, so we only do them once it starts getting warm. The day before baptisms was a very warm day, perfect for baptisms. On Palm Sunday, it got cooler and was super windy all day. I was excited that I had kids and adults to baptize for every service. However, that also meant I would be in the cold water and then in the cold wind for all three services. Yeah, it was COLD. Once the baptism were over, it took about three hours to get my body warm again.
We saw over 100 people baptized, almost 40 of them kids. Some other time I’ll share about our baptism process. For now, I’ll leave you with this video.
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Small Group Leader Success
Posted on 03. Apr, 2009 by Kenny.
How do you know when one of your small group leaders is doing a good job?
The evidence is usually pretty clear. The group grows. You see kids swarm around the leader when not in the kid’s building. Yeah, it’s pretty obvious. However, I saw a level of success this week that made my heart swell with pride.
On Sunday night I held a baptism class. We had about 15 kids participate with their families. At the end of the class parents fill out the required paperwork. One of the parents waved me over to their table. They asked me if it was okay if their daughter’s small group leader baptized her. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Of course it’s alright! I LOVE IT!
This small group leader in particular made a lasting spiritual impact. When giving the opportunity to choose who would baptize her, she chose her small gorup leader. That’s small group leader success.
What I’m excited about is watching this baptism happen. Hopefully the other girls from the group will get to watch/participate with what’s happening. I bet that at our next baptism, 4-5 more girls from this gorup will get baptized as well. Woo Hoo!
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Autism and Baptism
Posted on 17. Jul, 2008 by Kenny.
Just curious as to what you think. I held a baptism class this last weekend and I got this comment on one of my baptism response forms:
“My child is autistic and I’m not sure how much he really understands. How do you usually address this?
So, what do you do with a child with special needs who’s family has expressed a desire to have him or her baptized (specifically when you are unable to really determine their level of understanding)? I have some thought in my head, but I just thought I’d see what others had to say. Oh, and I haven’t actually talked to the family or child, so I don’t know where this child in particular is.
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