Childrens Ministry Online

Fammin vs Kidmin debate yada, yada, yada

Posted on 31. Jan, 2011 by Kenny.

Over the past month or two it’s been interesting to see this little debate pop up here and there and everyone voice their opinion. I’ll be real honest, when I first saw the posts popping up, I immediately assumed it was a sensationalistic stunt to stir stuff up, get lots of comments and make a scene. Like I could start a blog post saying that Sunday School is irrelevant and dead to the modern Chidlren’s Ministry and if you’re still doing it, you’re wasting your time and church’s money. Calm down, I didn’t mean that… honest. I was just making an example. Honest. (That would get a lot of comments, wouldn’t it?) However, I’m not going to judge. I don’t know what anyones intentions were. I’m not sure I really care. However, it is a somewhat interesting conversation though and I do have thoughts/opinions on the matter.

If I had to nail it down, I’d say the tension is more about a change in the times as it is semantic confusion. Ten years ago, the family pastor was pretty much unheard of. I’m not counting the Children’s Pastor who added “& Family” between “Children’s” and “Pastor” in their title. That WAS semantics and THAT Chidlren’s Pastor usually didn’t do anything different than any other Children’s Pastor. However, I think that strategies and methodologies are changing and people currently in some of these roles are feeling confusion and tension as parts of their jobs are changing, expectations about what they’re suposed to be doing is changing and who they report to is changing. As a result, some are trying to draw lines in the sand which may or may not be helpful. It may just be denial that things are unavoidably changing. When I became a NextGen pastor almost 3 years ago, I knew of two or three others in my role specifically. Now I know a few dozen. We’re seeing this role of Family Pastor emerge as a new role (or a rebirth of the Christian Ed Pastor from years ago as Jim Wideman likes to say). Good thing I got my degree in Christian Ed, huh?

Here’s where I see this trend going. Church plants will start hiring NextGen/Family pastors as one of their early hires who will oversee both kids and students, either as part time or full time positions. From the very beginning, the family will be a primary focus rather than just kids or students. Churches with this structure will probably experience less confusion, and Children’s Pastors and Student Pastors will probably be less confused or feel the need to draw hard lines. However, churches where student and children’s ministries are independent may feel this tension. Culture around them is pushing toward family ministry yet a role specific to that is vacant in their church, requiring them to define what that looks like.

So, my take is that this debate is more about a response to this strategic change as it is a need to define the value of a Children’s Pastor versus a Family Pastor, or whether current Children’s Pastors should do both. In my situation, I bear the weight of leading our family ministry strategy where my Children’s Pastors and my Student Pastors do their part in what they’re called to do with their unique gifts. Does that make sense? Thoughts?

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Orange is EXPLODING!

Posted on 26. Mar, 2010 by Kenny.

Have you ever had really high expectations for something and when you got there it was just… meh? Been there. But there’s something really cool about having a high level of anticipation about something that is GOING TO BE HUGE! Well my friends, that’s the 2010 Orange Conference for you. In spite of economic challenges and all the other things that could distract, Orange is BLOWING UP! Still being a month away, this year’s Orange Conference is smashing previous year’s registration. It’s going to be a year for the record books! If you’ve been in the past, you’re going to notice a difference. How exciting to be a part of a movement that’s got huge momentum. God’s certainly doing something through this strategy and this gathering of ideas to change families forever.

If you haven’t registered yet for Orange, it’s not too late. I’m serious, you DON’ WANT TO MISS THIS CONFERENCE! It very well could change your trajectory for life and ministry.

Added bonus: Anyone who registers before April 8th can get into the preconference for half price! That’s huge! I never miss a preconference! Click here to register right now or click on the badge to the right!

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Collaborate is shaking it up!

Posted on 09. Mar, 2010 by Kenny.

After just one day of pre-sale activity, Collaborate has made a big splash! The book isn’t even officially out yet; however, it reached the number one spot in Church Administration, Ministry as well as Ministry and Church Leadership. In addition, Collaborate reached the top 80 books for Christianity and was listed in the top 750 for all of Amazon. That’s a pretty big deal!

There’s a reason why this book is selling so well even before it’s been reviewed. It’s been written by a host of ministry leaders we all respect and it’s a topic we all want more guidance in. Get it while it’s hot!

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Order Collaborate NOW!

Posted on 08. Mar, 2010 by Kenny.

Before you read any more, click here to reserve your copy now. Do it before they sell out! Just kidding, they’re probably not going to sell out, but what are you waiting for, reserve your copy now!

I’m really honored to have been asked by Michale Chanley to write a chapter in this new book, but I’m just really excited to read it. If you think about it, this is the book we’ve all been waiting for. When it comes to Children’s Ministry, how many really great ones come out every year? Not that many. When I read the names of all the contributors, I keep thinking, “I wanna read what they’ve got to say.” This whole church and family thing is what I’m working on every day and there just aren’t as many people speaking into this at the moment. What a great time for this book to come out.

So, don’t delay, click on Amazon and reserve your copy. Actually, reserve a copy for everyone on your team! Reserve one for your pastor and maybe some key influencers on your staff. I can’t think of anything but good coming from this opportunity!

Again, click here to order your copies today!

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Dear kidmin curriculum publishers: Family content

Posted on 15. Feb, 2010 by Kenny.

It seems like everyone is talking about family ministry. No really, it’s for real this time. About 6-8 years ago children’s pastors began adding “and family” to their job title, but it’s been more recently than that since there’s been a ton of energy dedicated to this idea of engaging with parents, especially in the world of curriculum. I think that right now, the knowledgeable children’s pastor who’s shopping or curriculum is looking closely at what is being offered to parents as a component of the curriculum.

I really don’t think it’s enough to simply “add on” family stuff as if it were an after thought, but it needs to be highly developed and compelling. It could be the deciding factor for many children’s pastors making their selection. Some publishing companies have started developing some strong content for families, but there’s certainly room for more. Here are a few things to consider.

• Take home materials are dead. Most children’s pastors are trying to find creative ways to get parents to engage with take home papers, but most never make it to the home. If take home papers is a part of your family strategy, I’d seriously consider revising the strategy.
• Synchronize your family content with the kid’s content. I recently came across so family ministry curriculum that I was every excited about. It looked so good, I even considered what it would look like to switch curriculum. Then I realized that the family curriculum didn’t line up with the kids curriculum. No thanks. If I’m going to invest in this, I’m going to hit families with the same message from multiple.
• Make it affordable. I know, I’ll probably take some flack on this one. However, I feel that price is huge. As a church, I’ll supplement some of the cost, but if my parents aren’t leading their kids spiritually, it’s unlikely that they’ll elect to pay $15 a month for a resource to help them do something they weren’t already doing.

Anyone else have any ideas you’d like to see concerning family ministry content?

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Family ministry musings

Posted on 22. Dec, 2009 by Kenny.

A few weeks ago I just finished Barna’s book, Revolutionary Parenting. I bought 10 copies to distribute among church staff and leaders (not just kids staff). I just can’t stop thinking about what this book talked about. I think the premise of the book hits the nail on the head. What we in children’s ministry would truly see as success is a child who enters adulthood with a solid biblical worldview. Yet that’s not what we currently track to measure ministry success, is it?

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past 4-5 years, you’ve seen “family ministry” become the big buzz word among children’s pastors. Incredible new resources have been developed and powerful ideas have been presented. I love what’s happening in the world of family driven ministry. However, I can’t shake the sinking feeling in my gut that a lot of these “solutions” aren’t going to work in the long run.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m anything but a pessimist and I do love what is being developed… but I just don’t think I’ve seen that silver bullet yet. Maybe the silver bullet doesn’t exist, but I haven’t seen the thing that I can really wrap my arm around and say, “Holy Cow! This is it! Let’s throw all our eggs in this basket.” Maybe I’m being unrealistic to think that something like that exists, but maybe we’ve not discovered that “ah ha” idea yet. I think too many of us have gotten caught up in the family ministry resources like family productions, take home papers, family curriculum guides and aligned services and somehow we think that’s going to be enough to develop kids who will walk into adulthood with biblical worldviews. Yeah, I think they’ll help, but it’s not the answer.

Gateway’s a church that’s been raised out of the culture… and Austin is a very lost culture. I understand that in Barna’s research, a significant number of parents with biblical worldviews are letting their kids become adults without passing along the worldview piece. However, what do you do when MOST of your parents don’t have a biblical worldview? What does your family strategy look like to keep parents literally one or two steps ahead of their kids?

So, sorry for my wandering thoughts, just processing out loud. Any thoughts?

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Orange Philosophy: Something to think about

Posted on 25. Apr, 2009 by Kenny.

Orange isn’t just a conference, it’s a movement. It’s a strategy…even a philosophy. Ponder these two quotes as you prepare to get and overdoes in Orange next week!

“What happens at home is more important than what happens at the church.”

“The home is where the heart makes up its mind.”

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Dallas Leader’s Forum

Posted on 02. Mar, 2009 by Kenny.

I was invited to attend the Dallas Leader’s Forum today. Yeah, I’m not really that close to Dallas anymore, but I’m eating this stuff up.

Reggie Joiner is leading  a discussion on Family Ministry and how church staff can best connect with each other, volunteers, parents, the community, and other like-minded churches.

Yeah, why would I not want to be there? I’m looking forward to growing in this area and connecting with some people I don’t know… but want to!

By the time this post goes live, I’ll be at the forum. I’m sure I’ll twitter/blog all that I expereince.

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84 days until the Orange Conference

Posted on 04. Feb, 2009 by Kenny.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to count every day down to 0.

This year will be my second year to attend the Orange Conference. If you’ve never attended, let me tell you what it is.

Initially you’ll notice that it’s a conference with incredible speakers and breakout sessions all geared to children’s, student’s and family ministries. It absolutely is. If that’s all you know about it, that alone is compelling enough reason to sign up and go. I’d been to the CPC for a few years and was looking for a new and slightly different conference. The Purpose Driven Conference was not happening and I wasn’t convinced I wanted to go to Willow Creek. I didn’t know anything about Orange, but when I saw the speaker line-up, I knew it would be worth it.

However, about two months before I went, I figured out what Orange was really about. It was a new philosophy for Student and Children’s Ministry. It was a new philosophy for Family Ministry. When “Orange” was explained to me, I saw that it was the solution to many of the roadblocks I’d run into as a Children’s Pastor. I think it’s possibly to attend Orange, experience a great conference and amazing sessions and miss what Orange is really all about… but you’ll still have a great experience. However, if you get an understanding of the “Orange” philosophy is, you’ll be impacted in an even more profound way.

What is the Orange Philosophy? Buy this DVD. It’s $40, but it has the potential to shake up everything you ever believed about family ministry. You’ll understand what Orange is and you’ll probably want to attend the conference. Can’t afford to attend a conference this year? Buy this DVD. It’s not quite a conference, but it’s only $40.

Want more info? Last year I attended Orange and blogged every session, every breakout and every experience I had. Check it out here. I plan to take my blogging/twittering to the next level this year. I’m meeting up with all kinds of people this next year, so maybe I’ll add some video content along with everything else. You don’t want to miss it!

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Orange 2008: Rethinking Family Ministry

Posted on 02. May, 2008 by Kenny.

Like the Rethinking Children’s Ministry, this breakout was more of a round table discussion. On the stage was Mike Clear from Discovery Church in California, Daren Kaiser from Scranton, PA, Dave Fox from Indiana and Reggie Joiner. Each of these men serve as the Family Pastor at their churches (except Reggie of course).

Reggie began by explaining some of the different models of family ministry. One model is the departmental approach. This is where each department (student and children’s ministry) does it’s best to connect with parents. Another model is the supplemental approach. This is where a family pastor is hired to add programs to supplement parents ministry. This pastor more or less informs the other staff members (children’s pastor and student pastor) what he/she is doing. The Orange model is an integrated model. There may or may not be a family pastor (best if there is) that helps family ministry integrate through all the ministries.

Through a family ministry approach (integrated), the goal for teenagers is not perfect attendance in student ministry, but that they become fully integrated into the fabric of the church.

Reggie perfectly answered the question, “How do you effectively make a children’s ministry team and student ministry team feel like a unified team?” The answer? Meet together. Duh!

In an integrated strategy, you remove ministry silos and territorialism. In this strategy, student and chidlren’s teams work together on budgets, calendars and other things.

Reggie shared that there are three dials that need to be turned in the life of a child. The Wonder Dial, the Discovery Dial and the Passion Dial. The Wonder Dial is the understanding of faith, creation and who God is. The Discovery Dial is the understanding of how I personally fit into this knowledge of God, specifically relating to having a relationship with Jesus Christ. The Passion Dial is understanding my relationship with those around me.

So, when an integrated family ministry operates with the knowledge of these dials, the team can work together to turn these dials at the appropriate times within ministry. For instance, the Wonder Dial will be turned most during the preschool years, and only a little beyond that (mainly for outreach opportunities). The Discovery Dial is turned the most in elementary ministry and and student ministry and the Passion Dial will be turned the most in student ministry. Implementing this in an integrated strategy allows everyone in multiple ministries to be on the same page.

Here are a few more points made by the presenters:

• When you believe that what happens at home is more important than what happens at church, your calendar will slim down (from events).
• Who owns the strategy to “educate” the parents? It’s owned by the whole team, led by a leader.
• Every parent wants to have the right relationship with their kids… every kid needs a right relationship with a parent.

Oh, there was one more thing. Reggie shared four words and said that most parents fall into one of these four categories:

• Acquainted
• Connected
• Engaged
• Invested

Acquainted are usually the parents outside of your church… they don’t come. They aren’t against God or anything… they just don’t come. The Connected parents are attending your church. Engaged parents are ones that assume responsibility for spiritually raising their kids and Invested are those who are actively involved in discipling their kids… they’re doing this regularly.

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