Tag Archives: Parents
The Homeless Blogger: Things I’d tell the old me (Part 3)
Posted on 02. Nov, 2011 by Kenny.
You ever wish you could go back in time? Of course we all do. All of us have do-overs that we’d love to take. I’m no exception. There are a few things I learned over the years that would have been great to know when I was just starting out 10-15 years ago.
Thanks to Jim Wideman for hosting my last Homeless Blogger post. In this post I tell the old me, “Pay attention to the parents!” We hear this message all the time now through conferences, books and curriculum publishers. However, I remember questioning this stuff 9-10 years ago and not really know what to do with it. I don’t have any real ministry regrets, but sometimes I do wish I had known what I know now when it comes to equipping parents. Click here for the full post.
A special thanks to Spencer Click for hosting this post. In this post, I’d tell myself that leading a ministry of 400 kids is really no different from leading a ministry of 40 kids. Seriously, I’m being honest. The first church I led gave me the opportunity to lead 40 kids. My second church gave me the opportunity to lead 300-400 kids. The third church I led was smaller, only 150 kids. However, I learned something. I lead the church of 150 more like I led when I had 400. What about the church of 40? No, I’ll never lead like that again. Check out the whole post here.
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Sample Forms: Q & A
Posted on 24. Jan, 2011 by Kenny.
When organizing our trip to Ensenada, Mexico, we tried to think of questions parents would have and create answers on a Q & A. Amazingly, many of our parents were quite and satisfied. Sometimes the secret to creating a great Q & A is to pull a parent aside, tell them about what you’re doing and see what questions they have. Every trip is different, but feel free to use this Q & A as a template.
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Speaking of revolutions
Posted on 29. Mar, 2010 by Kenny.
Have you seen this show? It’s crazy good, one of the better shows I’ve seen on TV in a while. It’s inspiring, it’s funny and it will get your attention. However, as a pastor (specifically to kids) I’ve so connected with Jamie Oliver. I firmly believe that if things had turned out differently, he’d have been one of the greatest Children’s Pastors in the world. He loves people, specifically kids. He’s passionate about their health and to the point of tears, he’s committed to seeing kids make healthy choices in how they eat.
His show is called “Food Revolution.” Apparently, he made a significant impact in Great Britain, changing the way public schools feed their children and now he has his sites set on the United States. This show targets a small town in West Virginia which is labeled as one of the fattest and unhealthiest towns in the United States. Each week he faces obstacle after obstacle in his quest to help kids eat right so they can have long and healthy lives. It’s ridiculous how much he has to fight people, policies and methods to help them see the truth.
Every week I watch this show and I see parallel after parallel of what I encounter as a minister to kids. I only want what’s best for these kids. A strong and healthy faith and a relationship with God. In ministry, most people would agree that they want this for the kids as well, but people, policies and methods get in the way over an over again, preventing excellent and efficient ministry.
One of my favorite parts from this week’s episode was at a pivotal point when Jamie just wasn’t making progress. He was about to get thrown out of the school, go figure… the kids didn’t want to eat the healthy food. He organized a demonstration for the kids and invited the parents to come. He had a dump truck dump the fat a class of children would consume during one school year. It was massive and it was disgusting and it was a done deal. Jamie connected with the parents on a logical and emotional level and they were behind him 100%. Isn’t that what we’re trying to do. We know that unless we get the parents on board, we’re just going to struggle with little to show for our efforts?
Below I’ve embedded that clip.
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Dear kidmin curriculum publishers: Video access
Posted on 16. Feb, 2010 by Kenny.
This topic is closely related to my post last week about video curriculum, but from a different angle. More and more churches are relying on video driven or video rich content for their curriculum. Sometimes the video supplements the lesson and at other times the video is the lesson. In either of these cases, using video curriculum has been difficult to equip our volunteers for the service they are leading. I’m not sure if curriculum publishers have thought this through at all. So I get a DVD (or video file for those publishers that are pushing the limits) that I’m going to use at my weekend experiences. However, I have 3-6 lead teachers that have to interact with the video. Or I have 50 small group leaders that really should see the video beforehand so they know how to lead their group best after seeing it.
When I get this video, how do I prepare my leaders?
- I can tell you what I’m not going to do. I’m not going to order 3-6 discs for my lead teacher, nor am I going to order 50 for my small group leaders. That would be financially irresponsible.
- I’m not going to host a training every week (or once a month) just so everyone can see the videos. That would be a waste of everyone’s time.
So here’s what my options are:
- I can just let my leaders not really know what the video is about and have them wing it as best as they can.
- I can make copies of the DVDs and give one to each of my leaders.
- I can rip the video of the DVDs, put them on youtube or vimeo and share the link with all my leaders.
One of those options doesn’t adequately prepare my leaders. Two of those options are technically illegal. However, I know many children’s pastors who do the last two. Why? Because they want to equip their leaders and they don’t see any other way. They don’t want to break the law… they just want the ability to get their teams ready.
Can’t there be a way or a place where leaders and teachers can view the video on a website that we can direct them to? Maybe the video is kinda crappy, so you don’t have to be worried about someone stealing it.
The same it true with resourcing our parents. In order to equip our parents to lead at home, we’d like to let our parents see the same video their kids saw on Sunday. It can provide a great frame of reference for discussion around the dinner table. However, I can’t in good conscience broadcast videos I’ve ripped and uploaded to youtube. But, I don’t really have any other options. Can’t there be a way to give my parents access to these videos where there isn’t a concern about content being stolen?
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Why attend the Orange Conference 10: Reason #4
Posted on 04. Feb, 2010 by Kenny.
You’ve probably heard the statistic that more than 70% of students walk away from their faith within one year of graduating high school? Reggie has been working on a study about the loss of faith in college students and it’s turned into a book called “Slow Fadeâ€.  This is another hot question in the Christian community over the past several years and the topic of many studies (and even controversy over what it means).  Reggie has a unique take on what is happening that will bring clarity to this issue.
You may be thinking, “I work with kids, why does this matter to me?” That’s a dumb question. Of course it matters to those who work with kids becasue these kids walking away from their faith are our investment. Most of these kids sat in our children’s ministries for YEARS! We’ve got a lot invested and it matters greatly. The solution to this problem may start with what’s happening in our children’s programs.
Sure, you can by the book after Orange, but it will be more satisfying to get it at Orange, right? Yes. The answer is yes. If you haven’t already registered, click the button on the right. Your mother will be so proud.
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Why attend the Orange Conference 10: Reason #3
Posted on 02. Feb, 2010 by Kenny.
In this little series of why a person should attend the Orange Conference, I’m trying to show some of the great reason why to attend that aren’t totally obvious. Sure you’re going to learn a lot, you’ll get some great resources and network like crazy with all kinds of people. But there’s other reasons as well. Here’s reason number three.
This year Reggie will be unveiling a new strategy and resources for engaging parents. If you use ReThink materials, you’ve found that there are a lot of great resources for engaging parents, but not really one integrated strategy to present to parents of preschool kids or elementary kids. It’s been something they’ve been working on for some time and certainly a resource that people have been asking for. So, be sure to be there when this resource and strategy is released. Should be exciting! Click on the Orange Badge to the right to register for Orange.
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Requiring parents to serve: Conclusion
Posted on 06. Aug, 2009 by Kenny.
This little series turned out better than I planned. The feedback was incredible with lots of good stuff to think about. The funny thing is that none of this was planned. Coming back from vacation, it’s been a little harder to get back into a blogging routine. My post on Monday was a last minute idea and more of a short and simple post just to get one out on Monday. Funny how your involvement turned this into quite an engaging conversation.
Before all of this started (before I got the email asking for my advice) I found this blog post by Tim Stevens. Tim addresses this very same subject we’ve been discussing all week. If he were a children’s pastor, he suggested that he would get rid of any volunteer who were not passionate about serving kids. He recognized that it would be a dificult time as there wouldn’t be enough people, but you’d have a much more exciting base of bought-in volunteers.
I agree whole heartedly with Tim. There are plenty of parents I don’t want in my children’s program. However, I think there is room for a middle ground. I’m going to actively recruit parents who are willing. Some of those parents will do what is needed of them and then go back to something else. Others may discover a passion they never knew existed.
So in my book, requiring parents to serve is a bad idea, despite the handfull of cool results. As a leader, recruit some willing parents who are interested in joining the team. Oh, and whenever you do come across those “called to kids,” snatch them up before anyone else can get them! 
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Requiring parents to volunteer
Posted on 03. Aug, 2009 by Kenny.
While I was on vacation, I got an email from another church asking me the following questions:
1. Do you expect or require parents to volunteer?
2. If so when do you start expecting them (when they become members?
after attending 3 months?)
3. How is it working for you?
I’m going to post my answer tomorrow. Before I do, I’d like to hear what you think. Have you had success with serving requirements?
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Kid’s baptisms: Letting my parents drive
Posted on 11. Jun, 2009 by Kenny.
Last year I was really challenged with thinking Orange, specifically as it related to baptisms and children making decisions for Christ. See, I’ve had this baptism class thing down. I’ve been teaching it for years. Between teaching a class full of families to individual kids in my office, I could teach this thing in my sleep. Like I said yesterday, 15-20% of the kids I meet with haven’t yet made decisions for Christ. So I would usually offer an opportunity for kids to make that decision at the end of the class or right in the middle of the discussion if meeting with them one on one.
However, the night before leading my first baptism class at Gateway, I decided to re-write the class. Most of the components I’d been teaching for years stayed the same, but I added a fresh new take on the topic and added a segment I’d never done before. After I’d explained how a person becomes a Christ follower (this is done very carefully and specifically) I back off and let the parents drive. I explain that I’m going to leave the room for 15 minutes for parents and kids to discuss what they’ve heard so far. Parents are given some information with questions to ask to find out where they’re kids are and see if they’ve really made a decision to follow Christ yet. If not, parents are encouraged to pray with their kids if they’re ready. I even script out a simple prayer that parents can use to pray with their kids.
Initially I didn’t like doing this. Why? Because I’m a control freak. By letting the parents (who may have no experience doing this at all) I’m not sure if it was done right if it was really done at all. However, if I don’t let parents take the initiative here, they may not do it one their own. The cool thing is that I still have first time decisions every time I do one of these classes and it’s the parents who are praying with their kids to follow Christ. I’m a believer now. Let you parents drive!
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First six months: Results
Posted on 13. Nov, 2008 by Kenny.
I don’t love that only 1/3 of my parents are opening my emails. Why can’t it be half or 2/3? However, I’m getting 300-400 people open my email every week. That’s still a lot of people.
As soon as I started doing this, I was barraged by emails of parents thanking me for keeping them in the loop. I don’t get nearly as many emails with general questions anymore. Even when I have silent weeks where no one emails me back or sends a question, I’ll overhear people talking about things I wrote while in the check-in line on Sunday. Or a parent I hardly know will ask a specific question about something I blogged. I love it!
Sure, only 1/3 of people are opening the email every week, but these are the people who when you don’t communicate are the ones who will beg for information. I’m giving them what they want. Sometimes I’ll have a parent come up and ask me a question on Sunday morning. I’ll answer their question and then say, “did you know I have a Kids Quest blog with answers to questions just like you asked? If you’d like, I’ll put you on the email list this week.” I’ve found that when there is no communication, people get frustrated. When there is communication, people may have to ask where to get it, but once they know, they’ll be good from that point on.
TIP: Oh, just in case you wondered. Every week my admin adds the emails of new parents who attend each week. She does this in addition to updating this information in our church database as well. My Constant Contact will always be a copy of the data that is already in our church database.
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