I need to tell you about an even we held at Gateway this weekend. I claim no responsibility for this event, it was the brain child of my wife. I came to support her, but I did little to support her. This event was for me. Let me tell you a little about it.
Born Into Heaven was a memorial service to recognize and honor the short and quite lives of children lost to miscarriage, still birth and abortion. It was held on Saturday, the day before mother’s day as so many parents, especially moms, are burdened with the thoughts of their lost children. Too many parents lose children to miscarriage and they suffer in silence. Many times, no one knows of their loss. Although they never held their child, it doesn’t make that child any less alive or any less their own flesh and blood. Parents rarely have the time or space to mourn this loss. Other parents are shattered with the loss of a child at birth. Because it is so unexpected and tragic, people don’t know how to comfort these families or help them deal with the loss. Other parents suffer in silence over the guilt of hasty decisions of their youth. A quick abortion solves an immediate problem, yet leaves the stain of regret and guilt. Shouldn’t the church help families grieve and heal? That’s what Born Into Heaven is all about.
My wife thought up this event about 6 weeks ago when she was pregnant with our 6th child. Sara and I both know the pain of loss. During this difficult and tentative week-to-week pregnancy, Sara was burdened to create a place for families to mourn. It wasn’t just born out of a need other parents had, it was born out of something Sara and I needed. Other than a few close friends and immediate family, few people knew of our silent suffering. Few people know that Titus is our fourth child, the only one to make it past 9 weeks from conception. He’s our little miracle, our ray of light in a barren land of death and disappointment. Last year we lost our 5th child and only 4 weeks ago, we lost our 6th. Again, only a few people knew our pain, but a memorial such as Born Into Heaven is what paretns in our shoes need.
Like I said before, I came to support my wife. She shared our story on the stage, but she couldn’t look at me as I was an emotional wreck. So many people were able to come together, share their stories and recognize their loss. Many who go through this kind of loss neglect to consider themselves as moms and dads, but that is what they are. This day was about parents honoring their kids and processing through their pain.
Tomorrow I’ll share some of the details of the service as it may be something you will want to re-create for families in your church.
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You and Sara are brave parents. I’m glad to know that the event was a success, and more importantly that you received some special healing time with others that share your situation and circumstances in a unique way.
Way to go Sara!
.-= jonathan´s last blog ..Kidsplace Promotional Video =-.
Wow! I am in awe of you and your wife. We’ve known many people (most in CM) who have suffered the loss associated with miscarriage. Thank you to you and your wife for ministering through your pain to those in your community. Wow. I hope that many others read this and are inspired to do the same in their communities.
Incredible opportunity and incredible undertaking for you and your wife. I am thankful for innovation such as this to help people heal.
Thank you Sara for really desiring to see God work through and allow people to find healing in awful, awful circumstances.
.-= J.C.´s last blog ..May Groove – LCD Soundsystem =-.
this is absolutely beautiful. grateful for your courage –
You are very kind to say this was my brainchild. I think the skeleton of the event was my idea, but God did an incredible work of putting together a team of women to lead it. Truly, it was a team of women with different strengths and interests, that functioned peacefully in unity of purpose. An amazing group of men and women volunteered to make it happen. I have never seen an event come together so quickly and smoothly with only 2 weeks planning no less! God’s hand was all over the behind-the-scenes details of it for sure.
Praying for you and Sara, and humbled by both your servant hearts to reach out to those affected by the loss of a child while grieving that loss yourselves.
Sara and Kenny, thanks for your faithfulness to follow what the Lord put in your heart and your willingness to be open about your mourning process. Many will be touched by this ministry. You have a beautiful spirit in all of it. we are blessed that the Lord has given all of us Titus.
Kenny, thank you for writing about this. It is beautiful. I’m looking forward to reading what you write tomorrow too. Dad wrote something earlier, but I don’t see it.
This is beautifully written…I am so blessed that I did attend this beautiful service…to comfort those who mourn! Our God is so awesome as He is The Great Comforter and Has established comfort by the power of His Holy Spirit!
Thank you to both you and Sara for relying on our God to see great and mighty things which we could have never known before!
What a beautiful testimony of our Awesome God and His grace over you and your beautiful family!
Love with God’s Great Love..Teresa
I hope that other churches will read this and consider doing this type of event. What an incredibly meaningful act for your body of believers. Mourning is Biblical – and Christians sometimes miss this.
In the meantime, thanks for being personal. Authentic and multi-dimensional believers have nearly always walked through pain.
Thank you Kenny!
.-= Amy Fenton Lee´s last blog ..Refocusing Volunteers & Nourishing the Parents =-.