I’ve been enjoying the conversations with several people about the subject of requiring parents to serve in the children’s ministry. Several of you all shared your opinions here. I shared my opinion here.
Several of you had some amazing comments. However, one thing I kept hearing over and over again was this idea of calling. Several people said that if a parent isn’t called to be in the room, they shouldn’t be in there. This intrigued me and I knew I wanted to discuss it further.
So, let me set the stage. Let’s take the idea of requiring parents off the table. Let’s also not talk about parents we’d all agree don’t need to be in our classrooms. Do you feel the only person who belongs in a children’s ministry environment is a parent or volunteer who feels called it it? Really?
This afternoon I got this in my facebook inbox in regard to the comments on my first post:
“This “Only Serve Where You are Passionate†band wagon has got to stop.
Our desire for people to be “fulfilled†or more honestly, self-fulfilled, has back fired.
It is a superficial high, it is a false Happy Place.
True serving is a state of heart and mind. Not always warm and fuzzy.
It is often a sacrifice where we truly have to lean on God and go beyond our natural human selves.
Self-fulfillment is not what we should be seeking but is often where we find our greatest passion.”
What do you think about this idea of “called” volunteers? What about this idea of self-fulfilled volunteers? I’m really eager to see what you’re thinking.
I’d like to see some biblical support for a “calling” to Children’s Ministry, or serving in general. I’m pretty sure you won’t find it. And I think that same Bible will be pretty clear that unless you’re “Called” to preach and teach, that we all fall under the Helps ministry.
And every #kidmin know we could all use some helps!
So after reading all the post and taking into careful consideration, I am alarmed! When will the church recognize that children are not the church of the future but that they are very much the church TODAY!! I sometimes find myself sitting on the fence as to what is the right way to build a strong, endless number of volunteers. We have looked at making it a ‘requirement’ to ‘what is your gifting?’ And its obvious that across the country churches are struggling with this very issue!!
So, here are my questions: What brought each of you to your point of service? Would it have anything to do with YOUR relationship with Jesus? Would you say that perhaps your service comes out of your relationship with your creator and that through the desire to grow deeper in your relationship with Him, that is where your service pours out of? Listen, we have a culture of unchurched young Christians that are being sold into Christianity through trends. We have installed coffee bars, have made our sanctuaries look like concert halls but have we given them the tools to grow in the Lord? Are we providing discipleship classes, how about membership commitments, or ummm, accountability? We can’t expect the multitude to serve until we have fed them!!! So quite possibly, this issue isn’t relative to just CM, but the church as a whole.
I’ll throw my thoughts out there maybe we are on the same page or maybe not.
All people, that have a relationship with God are called to serve God:
1 Peter 2:9
And we are all given gifts by God for service:
Ephesians 4:11, Romans 12:3-8, & 1 Corinthians 12
and just as Jonathan said, we can all do something but some can’t do everything. It would make sense to align people with where their gifts can be most effective for God.
Maybe I’m off base…
.-= J.C.´s last blog ..Are we teaching kids in an effective way? =-.
You have to clarify the meaning of “called”. If you mean called, as in your life purpose, or called, as for a season. I think sometimes we use the word “called” interchangeably with the word “sent”. I truly believe that people can be sent to serve for a season, not necessarily to serve in CM their entire lives. But that direction is no less God-inspired than the person who is a Children’s Pastor by vocation. Prov 20:24 says our steps are directed by the Lord. I think what I have seen are people whose personality and giftings by nature tend to work well with children and the impromtu craziness than can sometimes come with CM serve most enjoyably. I truly believe God directs the steps of these people to serve in CM. The people who are obedient to His leading, find great fulfillment, not just a warm and fuzzy feeling, from being obedient & serving. That is what keeps them serving, good days, bad days, crazy days & smooth days. We do learn to lean on Him, and His strength, but we can find great joy in seeing Him work in and through us!
Here is what I don’t want – People serving in the kids’ room out of a sense of obligation, who CLEARLY want to be ANYWHERE else. I want my teachers to be called without a doubt. I’ll plug parents in once a month, called or not, but not my teachers!
The comment you quoted above makes some good points, but a calling does not always equal a passion. I was passionate about worship ministry and as plugged in as much as any volunteer could be, to the point of being the paid “fill in” worship leader as needed. I sing, write music – my passion. Next thing I knew, God was calling me to Children’s Ministry. Bam – just like that – I’m transformed into a Children’s Minister. Yes, I can use my passion for Worship in the Children’s ministry (and I do), but my calling (at least for this season) has changed. Am I now passionate about CM? You better believe it! But a calling came before my service started.
We do need to help people understand the importance of listening to the Lord. You never know where He might lead you! Sometimes it lines up with your passions, but most of my life-changing experiences with the Lord have been when I followed Him outside of MY passions, and allowed Him to transform my passions. (like going to Uganda, leading the CM, even exercise!)
As leaders it is our job to inspire people to serve Christ, not guilt them into serving. Nobody wants to do anything out of guilt and nobody wins when that is the determining factor. Our call is to Love God, and Lover Others. I can serve anywhere in do that whether it’s setting up a chair or equipping a parent in discipling their kids. Not everyone in our ministry is called to leadership, but we are all called to serve. Serving isn’t about being “warm and fuzzy”, it’s about finding “joy” that isn’t self fulfilling, but Christ fulfilling.
.-= Pat´s last blog ..Celebrating Dads for 100 Years =-.
On my desk is a list of jobs that I need to fill in my Children’s Ministry. Most of those positions are filled, and I think that God has “called” each of the people who are filling those positions. If He did not call those people to fill those spots, then I think I have the wrong people in place.
I believe God is “calling” more people in to fill the spots that I have open.
I believe every person who is volunteering in any position at a church is called to be there.
Very good stuff. I agree with you Pat. Our job is to inspire people to serve Christ. Whether it is with kids, parking, hospitality or what. I’m not always looking for people who are called, I’m looking for people who are willing. I’ll plug anyone who is willing (within reason… you know) on a team. They may serve as an extra set of hands or doing simple administrative tasks. However, as I see people that I’ve plugged in begin to flourish and I begin to see some natural gifts or abilities come to the surface, I begin grooming them as a leader, teacher or some other important role that just anyone can’t fill.
Let’s face it. We have roles where we no doubt need people highly gifted and called. However, we also have many roles that need people willing to serve Christ. Some of my best (VERY BEST) volunteers were people never called to Children’s Ministry. They served becasue they had kids and felt it was right to do their part. They were so willing, they had fun and were soooo dependable.
Not that finding people who are called isn’t important, it just bugs me when finding the called becomes our mission. Sometimes it’s about finding the willing. You can build an amazing ministry of willing hearts and hands.
.-= Kenny´s last blog ..Requiring parents to serve: Called to serve? =-.
These are all great thoughts. Of course we want everyone in our church to serve and to serve willingly and joyfully. But the beauty of the Christ and His mercy is that He allows us to worship Him or flick Him off. Are job should never be to fill volunteer roles so we can hold services. Our job is to take kids, families, and individuals that are either idle, indifferent, or just far from God and foster them to a lifelong passionate pursuit of Jesus Christ. Serving becomes a natural byproduct. I don’t ever want my kid to be around someone in chruch that is being forced to love him. If we don’t have enough loving volunteers then we get back to the drawing board. But once we force people to do something we begin to put shackles on people who are meant to be free. And as scripture says we must use are freedom for His glory not ours. As for the “called” I agree with your example Kenny we are called to see the need in front of us and meet. Sometimes it’s in our giftedness and sometimes not. Thanks Kenny and everyone else for the conversation.
this discussion has gone to a place i dwell a lot. I call it “pew warmers”, first let me make clear I understand My church is a seeker church and not everyone wants to dive in & I understand fully being a recent agnostic. but to the point …. I’ve had my times of callings or being led by God to do something and times when I did something merely because I knew it needed to be done. I don’t understand standing idly by while something needs to be done, waiting on a calling or prompting… if someone is drowning do we wait for God before throwing a lifeline?? make it smaller if there is trash do you really need God to tell you to pick it up?? No doubt teaching the kids needs to be by a qualified person, but to help teach (not to make it a demeaning task) really just takes a responsible adult. …. don’t love kids?? then I quote CS Lewis “Don’t waste time bothering whether you “love†your neighbor; act as if you did. †Why? Because says Lewis, “When we behave as if we love someone, we will come to love him.â€
I think that someone that is called to serve the children’s ministry will do it with more passion.
BUT I only realised I was called to it AFTER I started to serve in the children’s ministry and today I know God called me to do it and I am totally passionate about it.
And thinking now about the question if it’s ok to force the parents to serve… well… I don’t really agree, but… I only started to serve in the children’s ministry because I came to Australia to do Hillsong College, and I was allocated to the children’s ministry (and you can’t really change during the first months or something like that), so in practice I was “forced” to do it… 😀
Merriam-Webster defines “calling” as:
1: a strong inner impulse toward a particular course of action especially when accompanied by conviction of divine influence
2: the vocation or profession in which one customarily engages
I don’t think you have to meet either of these definitions in order to be involved in the children’s ministry or to help support the children’s ministry. However, we do need people to be called in positions of leadership (teaching, worship, etc) for the sake of all!
Kenny, you described willing workers in your post. That is a wonderful description of what I was trying to say earlier on facebook! That is what I am!
As far as forcing parents to volunteer? I think that could create resentment in some. What about strongly encouraging involvement on some level? Once a quarter, once a month, etc.
I don’t agree about making Parents required to serve. I think that as leaders in the church part of our job is to find a place for a person to serve. If wants to serve in Children’s Ministry I will find a place for them to serve. It is about finding that place where God wants them to serve. We don’t have to find the mark exactly on the first try, we’re not perfect, but that as leaders we are sensitive to God’s will. It’s about help people serve where God wants them or “called” to be and not filling spots and jobs. Just my opinion though.